Too Young To Be Old.
I haven't really mentioned anything about a new mobility device I ordered for my new flat, I did tweet about it very briefly but to be honest; I felt embarrassed.
We've all been there, if you're young and you need to use mobility equipment, I feel like everyone goes through different stages of emotions, almost like how people go through the 7 stages of grief. When I realised I first needed to use a walking stick, it took a while for me to not feel self conscious, I thought everyone was staring at me. But now, I don't even notice, it becomes a part of you and it is a life saver for me. I went through the same thing when I started using my wheelchair, but even worse because it's not a self propelled chair so not having any control of where I was going or doing was, quite frankly, shit. But again, I got over it and now I don't notice people looking at me and the wheelchair enables me go to a lot further and do so much more.
But this new toy I've got is a walker.
I spoke to a occupational nurse when I went to the fibromyalgia self management program and we both said a walker could slowly replace my wheelchair, because I could do a little bit of walking and then rest on the seat that's on the walker. I thought "yes! That's such a good plan, maybe I could use it instead of my chair when shopping and then I could go into town by myself and get out the house more and.." my imagination went wild. But now that is definitely not how I feel. I have it set up in the kitchen because it's really helpful for me to sit on it while I make a basic snack or a cup of tea, so it's definitely already improving my quality of life, but I'm terrified to use it outside the house. I've never seen a person my age in real life using one, and I feel like the judgement of the public will be so much worse than when I use my wheelchair. I'm hoping this is just the knock on effect from all the stress of moving house and a recent flare up, I don't feel like myself mentally or physically right now so the thought of building up the courage to face the outside world with a walker is just too daunting.
I spoke to a occupational nurse when I went to the fibromyalgia self management program and we both said a walker could slowly replace my wheelchair, because I could do a little bit of walking and then rest on the seat that's on the walker. I thought "yes! That's such a good plan, maybe I could use it instead of my chair when shopping and then I could go into town by myself and get out the house more and.." my imagination went wild. But now that is definitely not how I feel. I have it set up in the kitchen because it's really helpful for me to sit on it while I make a basic snack or a cup of tea, so it's definitely already improving my quality of life, but I'm terrified to use it outside the house. I've never seen a person my age in real life using one, and I feel like the judgement of the public will be so much worse than when I use my wheelchair. I'm hoping this is just the knock on effect from all the stress of moving house and a recent flare up, I don't feel like myself mentally or physically right now so the thought of building up the courage to face the outside world with a walker is just too daunting.
Lightweight folding 4 wheel rollator walker in Quartz
I think once I've recovered more from the move and Christmas, I'll definitely take it for a test run and I'll do a post about how I felt and whether it was beneficial. Until then, I want to get back into blogging again but it's a bit difficult when you're feeling a bit down in the dumps! Any spoonies who have used a walker in public please hit me up, I'd love to hear your experiences!
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